Home > Flotsam > What is your blog’s theme tune

What is your blog’s theme tune

(or where I try for the worst blog title in the world)

Sinking to a new low, I’ve decided to enter the competition for the worst blog title ever.  And coupled with it, the worst blog post ever.  Where do I sign up?  Seriously, I’ve seen so many bad, clichéd, rehashed posts in the blogging about blogging or make money online blogs that there must be a competition somewhere.

Hey now, be thankful I didn’t go with “Is your blog a ducker or a Diva”.  Oh man.  That was funny.  Even though I say so myself.  Even though you have to pronounce Diva wrong.  Oh.  C’mon, not even a chuckle?  Where’s the humour, where’s the love?  Maybe you didn’t get it.

So, seriously, when is everyone going to pull finger and stop just copying shit.  God, it gets so boring watching the same rubbish come round again and again and again.  Bad analogies here, terrible metaphors there, and stupid lists to try and get Digg on your arse?  Ptha! Yeauch.  C’mon, our blogs are meant to give insight, advice, ideas, inspiration.

Complete long term success from blogging can only come from being honest, not trying to shift snake oil.  Offer good advice and a better product, get some good targeted traffic and you will be successful.  You don’t have to stoop to being a second rate huckster in a stupid polyester suit with a daft pink tie to make you look the business.  Sell something you believe in.  Stop affiliating crap.  Stop writing crap.  Or at least, stop writing what everyone else is writing.

You know the sad thing I’ve noticed – posts that get the most comments on people’s blogs are the rubbish posts, the ones that pander to your ego, the ones that say “hey are you part of the cool club?”, “of course you are”.  The ones that get the least comments are the ones that give rock solid advice or ideas.

Oh well, can’t beat ’em, join ’em eh?  Let’s see how this post could be if we did.

What is your blog’s theme tune?

If your blog had a theme tune, what would it be?  Are you wallowing in the depths of self pity standing at the back of the club, dressed in black, shoulders stooped, head down mumbling the oh-so-meaningful words to Mother by Lennon?  Or are you up in the front, in your face banging out a “work hard play hard” attitude song like “We will rock you” with your fists raised in the air, jumping up and down like you’re about to make your millions?

See, your blog readers will respond to your blog like they would to your theme tune.  If it’s all down and out and mopey and sad, do you think that your readers are going be revved up to buy your shit?  (Shut up in the back, that was rhetorical you f’ing heckler……) Where was I (shuffle notes um um oh yes) No!  they won’t buy a thing.  They won’t buy squat and your blog will sink to the bottom of the pile.  You will fail.  YOU will be a loser.

But, if your blog has the attitude of a blood boiling rock tune, you readers will feed off that.  They will know you are the man!  they will reward you with their loyalty and adoration.  They will want to be you.  They will buy whatever you throw at them.  Yes they will!  Because your attitude filled-song screams out your success to them (and if it doesn’t, turn up the volume and beat them into submission until they do what you want).

Do you want to be a loser?  Do you?  No! Of course not!  YOU want to be a winner!  You want to be like me.  You want to be great! (by the way, my book is only 9.95)  Nothing says WINNER like a great fuck off theme tune.

I challenge you to take a good hard look at your blog.  What would it’s theme tune be at the moment?  What would you want its theme tune to be in the future?  Now, write like your blog has the theme tune of success!

Bleauch.  I feel just a little bit dirtier now.  Maybe I should get out of this game.

Well, you’ve had a bumper crop of posts from me this week.  Next week sees the end of my Charity challenge.  Anyone who signed on, it will be time to pony up your cash.  I’ll put up my post on it and then I should spend some time on building some links to my sites that actually earn me a few pennies here and there rather than ranting about the state of the pro and semi-pro-blogging industry.

One more thing.  Would be great if you are going to try “fake it till you make it” and try and sell the same crap to people all the time if you learned the difference between “there” and “their”.  Oh, and “a lot” is two damn words not one! grrrrrr!

Categories: Flotsam
  1. Dan
    November 28, 2008 at 18:33

    Great post(s), lol.

    The problem is that nearly everything these days is sadly re-hashed, and anything ‘new’ is normally not shared until its become known among too many people.

    Maybe instead of naming this post the worst post, you should of called it ‘how to get more comments than you can shake your self-esteem at’, lol! I could imagine that theme tune post being on a hell of a lot of blogs – giving no ‘real’ information and just whipping people into some kind of ‘frenzy’.

    I’d bitch more, but I stop now in case I’ve done what I have complained about in my own blog, lol!

  2. underdogblogger
    December 2, 2008 at 09:19

    Lol – Dan – your blog is one of the few that actually gives away workable ideas on a regular basis, rather than just pandering to link and comment bait.

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